Peace...

I'm dealing a lot with my view on "just war."  I wonder if there is such a thing.  I mean I see how the Old Testament is ridden with war, but I wonder how Jesus' teaching deals with that.  It seems that we have just lost some of our creativity, and that we need to redefine terms like Jesus always did.  The best way to disarm violence is to surprise it.  When sued for our coat, surprise them by giving them more than they asked.  Surprise them, and expose their greed.  It is amazing that when we get creative how different things really can be.  I pray that I can become a creative genius.  I've never thought myself to be very creative, but Lord knows that I what I want to become.  I pray God will continue to develop things in me to teach me how to come at situations differently than anyone has ever done.  I need God to open things up to my mind.  I pray that I will never settle for just reacting, but that my life would truly be seen as "namaste."  It means to see God in someone.  That my life would continually be seen as Jesus.  I want my love to surpass all things, and my grace to be unending.  God I need you to fill me, to guide and direct me, present yourself to me in new ways so that I can understand more, and share more.  I want to see you in all the areas of my life God, I'm so tired of wanting it and not finishing.  I am on my way, but I'm not even close.  I'm afraid to pray this prayer, but God I know I need to be humbled, and I need to feel desperation.  I pray that you would send me, take me, move in me in ways that make me understand you more fully, so that I can cope and understand others better.  I don't know what I need, but you do, and I pray that you would rain down on me.  To use your chisel, and to knock me off so hard that I never get back to it.  Make my life about your love, and who you are, not how I'll look, or who I am.  I want to give it all to you, I'm offering it all right now, don't let me take my word back.  Even when it's hard and I'm exhausted, I need to find you.  Build more character in me, refine me, mold me God.  I desire you, and only you.  Thank you God.